Tim and I got home a few days ago from a weekend, just us, in Miami. We started an anniversary tradition last year and I’m already counting down the 365 days until we get to do it again.
I cherish these trips more than I can put into words!
And this is why…
If you’ve read Letting Go of Leo or heard me share my story on a podcast over the years, then you know that my honeymoon was a really significant moment for me in my relationship with myself. It was my rock-bottom-break-down-to-break-through moment that set me on a trajectory of healing my relationship with myself.
Not only would I not be doing the work I’m so grateful I get to do here with you all (hiii UNMEASURED!!), but I wouldn’t be the person I am today if it weren’t for that.
As the story goes, a tearful confession to Tim about how I felt inside led me to work with a health coach, get back into therapy, and ultimately let go of who I believed I should be so I could discover who I truly am.
The lesser-told story is all the shame, guilt, and grief I had to process over the moments in my life when I was so fixated on running more miles or eating fewer calories or hitting a certain number on the scale. The people I snapped at because I was so stressed from it all, the moments I was there but wasn’t really there, the ways I hid away from the people closest to me.
Part of the healing is processing all these feelings.
Part of the healing is self-forgiveness.
And, part of the healing is knowing that YOU STILL CAN.
The honeymoon you spent obsessing over calories + miles? YOU STILL CAN have a love-filled trip where you soak up every moment ♥️
Whatever it is that disordered eating or obsessive exercise or body hatred or perfectionism or whatever coping mechanisms you’ve developed have distracted you from?
YOU STILL CAN have those experiences in the future.
For me, this annual Miami anniversary celebration is a moment of full circle, deep down in my soul healing. The biggest offering of forgiveness to myself and the full acceptance of it. A deep acknowledgment that there’s no need to focus on what I missed before because I’m fully free to LIVE what’s happening now.
✨ You still can ✨