what you & this high school heir to an empire have in common

Boy oh boy do I love a good elite school drama. The Skulls? Easily one of my top 5 favorite movies. The Secret History? Devoured that book!

Naturally, when Amazon Prime recommended the tv show Maxton Hall – The World Between Us… I couldn’t resist.

Without giving too much away, I have to share about one scene with you…

The two main characters – Ruby (a scholarship student who desperately wants to get into Oxford) and James (the heir to an uber wealthy family & fashion empire) – are having a conversation.

James is sharing how his life is basically planned out for him by his father. From what he will do that night to where he will go to college and what he will do for a job for the rest of his life… it’s all pre-destined, leaving him without any choice.

Ruby asks him what he would do if he got to do whatever made him happy and he replied, “I don’t know.”

While I can’t say that James Beaufort’s life is particularly relatable, his response in that moment certainly is.

You may feel like, in some ways, your life has been planned out for you, too. Whether it was expressly stated by adults in your life when you were growing up or from other pressures, shoulds, and expectations you picked up and internalized along the way.

You move through your days doing what you should do. Saying what you should say. You check all the boxes, follow all the rules, say all the right things, or feel awful about yourself if you can’t do it all perfectly.

It feels pre-destined and you are left without much choice.

Women often tell me they feel like they are acting out a character of who they should be in their lives, rather than actually living. Have you ever felt that?

Like you’re…

  1. holding yourself to an unreasonable or even unattainable standard at all costs;
  2. held back from doing anything at all by an unreasonable or even unattainable standard because you feel like you’ll never be able to live up to that standard (the perfectionist paralysis);
  3. stuck in all-or-nothing mindset; and/or
  4. people pleasing (yes, it’s a form of perfectionism!)

​It can be scary to imagine doing it differently. There are many reasons why it can feel scary but one of the biggest, most underrated reasons?

You might not have any idea what would make you happy (just like James Beaufort).

A life of doing what you should can often leave you feeling disconnected from your true self. And when you’re disconnected from yourself, it’s hard to have clarity about what you like, want, or need.

If this is you, I just want to say that it’s OK to not know the answer to the question, “what would you do if you could do whatever would make you happy?”

It doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you (nothing is wrong with you).

It simply means you have a beautiful opportunity to reconnect with yourself.

You just don’t know yet.

I’m hosting a FREE 4-day challenge from June 17-20 to help you find your way out of the perfectionism that is exhausting you and back home to yourself so you can actually enjoy the life you’ve worked so hard to create!

You can learn more + sign up here. I’d love for you to join me for this!

xo, Sim

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