what do dragons & binge eating have to do with each other?!


Please don’t send help! The rabbit hole that I never want to make my way back out of is fantasy novels. Well, I’ve been told the type of fantasy novels I enjoy are actually called “romantasy.”

Call them whatever you want but I call them FUN.

Like most of us, I saw everyone and their dragon-loving mothers posting about the novel Fourth Wing. To be honest, I’ve *struggled* to finish books since having kids. I get to the end of the day and my focus is spent. It was an easier lift to re-watch a favorite episode of Felicity. As a TV lover and avid self-compassion practicer, I didn’t beat myself up about this. I had actually fully accepted this about myself.

But my my my how the tables have turned. I READ NOW. Like, many pages a day.

Nobody is more surprised than me.

It turns out, I needed to read books I actually enjoy! And, to my surprise and delight, I actually ENJOY reading about dragons, magical lands, and fairy lords.

Since shows like Game of Thrones are way too violent for me, I wrote the entire genre off completely. But, in 100 pages, Fourth Wing showed me the error of my ways.

So, here I am! A gal who carries her newest romantasy novel around with her everywhere. From devouring a few pages in the school pick-up line to a pre-bed reading sesh, I can’t get enough.

Pleasure is amazing like that, right? We want it. We need it. We crave it!

And this is what dragons have to do with binge eating: PLEASURE.

Binge eating is one of my all time favorite topics. Not because binge eating is fun, but because as someone who struggled with it for years (and has helped hundreds of clients break up with binges), I know how lonely and shameful it can feel. And when we feel alone and when we feel ashamed, it’s REALLY hard to heal. .

Binge eating isn’t the “problem” that needs fixed (although many of the conventional tips for binge eating treat it like it is! Hence why they rarely work). It’s actually a reaction to something deeper going on. And that something deeper is almost always related to restriction.

I’ll dive all-the-way-deep with you on the topic of binge eating in a solo episode of the UnMeasured Podcast coming your way soon, but for today, let’s focus on one of the lesser discussed forms of restriction: restriction of pleasure

Because if the only way you get to experience pleasure in your day is zoning out and eating brownies at night… it makes sense that you’d want to eat a lot of brownies.

On a subconscious level, you’re finding ways to meet that human need for pleasure (even though I know how hard/painful/NOT pleasurable it feels after a binge).

I’ve been right there where you are so many times.

When I was healing my relationship with food, adding in pleasure (from food throughout the day but also and especially from non-food things) was a big part of that healing. This is often a big theme with the women I coach around binge eating, as well!

So, if you are someone who struggles with binge eating, I’d love to invite you to explore… what’s your relationship with pleasure like?

Here are some questions that can help…

How do you feel when you hear the word ‘pleasure’?

What thoughts or judgments arise for you around that word?

What in your life do you do for the pure enjoyment of it? Outside of binges, do you let yourself experience pleasure with food?

What feels fun for you?

Do you allow yourself to receive/experience pleasure?

As human beings, we need rest, pleasure, and connection. I named this as the “Craving Trifecta” in my work! When we prioritize and embrace these (rather than intentionally or unintentionally restricting them), it’s amazing what happens.

xo, Sim

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