Over a decade ago, I was secretly struggling with binge eating.
I’d spend all day long doing everything “right.” Everything the health magazines told me to do. Everything the books recommended. Everything celebrities claimed worked wonders for them. Everything my nutritionist instructed me to do.
I measured my food, counted my calories, ate only things on the “abundant health” list. I pounded the pavement every morning and made it to hot yoga as many evenings as I possibly could. I hydrated hydrated hydrated.
I followed the rules.
I did everything “right.”
Doing everything “right” according to diet culture? Well, this triggered a binge.
Day after day, week after week. I’d find myself standing in front of the open fridge door, rummaging through the cabinets, shoveling as much food into my mouth as I possibly could.
It would start with “just one” spoon of peanut butter. “Just one” graham cracker. “Just one” of whatever I was eating that was “wrong” and before I knew it, it was like I had disconnected from my body. I was in a trance. I was hovering above myself, looking down as I methodically ate and ate and ate.
Here’s the thing: I’ve worked with a lot of women who come to me with the same story that I had. The story of doing everything “right.”
But what is “right” by diet culture’s standards? Is not right for you.
Restriction and food rules (encouraged by diet culture) trigger binges.
The answer to healing binges is not doing more of what diet culture tells you is “right.”
The answering is in releasing the idea that one way of eating is “right” or “better” or “good” and, instead, learning how to tune in to your body, nourish yourself consistently, and find freedom from the diet culture lies.
If you’re ending your day and just had a binge (a common time for binges to occur after a day of restriction) and you’re beating yourself up because you’re doing everything “right” except the binges keep coming…
I hope this will be a moment of truth for you.
Your binges are your body’s way of trying to protect you from the restriction that diet culture tells us is “right.”
Healing is not on the other side of MORE rules. It’s on the other side of freedom from them!
If you’re struggling with binges, I share a supportive practice here in this post.