Six years ago, I walked in the doors of a sweet little barre studio called Studio B.
At the time, my primary form of movement was long distance running and I had a super unhealthy relationship with movement.
I felt guilt if I missed a planned workout, I was pushing my body way harder than she needed to be pushed, and I was ignoring signs that my choices simply weren’t in the best interest of my health.
Without a doubt, Studio B changed my life.
Barre class was different than anything I had every tried before!
Something small inside of me shifted during that first class. I was awkward and uncoordinated, yet I walked out of that barre class feeling a little stronger.
I don’t mean physically stronger, but stronger in my heart.
That little whisper inside (and the shaking in my legs) made me want to come back for more.
That night, I told Tim I’d met so many kind women at the Studio. He claims I said “I’m going to make so many friends,” but I don’t remember it quite like that…
I took another class the next day, a few days after that, and before I knew it I’d hung up my running shoes and found a new way to move my body.
After a few years as a student, I was so honored to become an instructor. And, over the last 6 years I’ve spent over 1,000 hours in that studio – some taking class, some teaching. And many more unaccounted hours before and after class connect with the women who truly did become dear friends.
Barre (and the incredible woman at Studio B) changed my relationship with movement. And, my relationship with myself.
Barre taught me so much about treating my body with respect and learning to love the person behind the eyes I starred at in front of the mirror during each and every class.
When life got crazy, when I changed my career, when I got pregnant, when I became a mom, when I lost my dad, and so many other moments in between… I knew my mat was a place that I could come back to myself and feel at home.
Last weekend, a beautiful chapter closed (and you better believe we celebrated all 6 years of Studio B!!).
It was a bittersweet ‘goodbye’ to Studio B.
It was also a ‘hello’ to a new chapter of movement in my life.
This week, after years of feeling masterful in the way I moved my body, I woke up Monday morning as a beginner again.
I’m trying a new way of moving and I’ll tell you this: I’m no expert yet!
I’m awkward and uncoordinated and figuring things out.
I’m also 100% ok to be in this place.
Because this is how I felt that first day 6 years ago when I walked through the Studio B doors and took my first barre class.
And all those years at Studio B taught me the gifts of being a beginner.
Those years taught me that when you stick with something, when you practice, when you speak with kind words to yourself, when you laugh at your clumsiness, when you show up for yourself, when you get curious, when you ask the people who are experts questions, when you don’t let fear of failure hold you back…
incredible growth is possible!
So this week, as I clumsily jump around my make-shift basement gym, I’m encouraged by these truths that the last 6 years have taught me.
Every master started out as a beginner.
Every expert is the beginner at something in her life right now.
If you’re willing to let the growth you’re yet to experience excite you, there is no shame in being exactly where you’re at today.
P.S. what’s one thing you’re a beginner at right now?