Nobody Wants to Hear This (but you need to)

The fantasy of growth/change/evolution is this: once you have the thing you’re dreaming of, all of your challenges melt away.

And, while nobody wants to hear this…

The reality is that as human beings, there will always be challenges.

As we grow, change, and evolve, they will just be different ones that we are faced with.

I can think of so many of these examples from my own life.

🙅🏻‍♀️When I struggled with binges as a response to restriction and also as a way to emotionally soothe, I fantasized that if I could *just* stop binge eating, all my problems would go away.

✨The reality is that I had to grow my capacity to hold emotional discomfort. I had to develop the mindset practices to move through decades of diet culture programming that made me feel terrified to eat normally. I had to gain the skills to emotionally regulate in other ways.

With healing, I was no longer struggling with binges. But, there were new challenges: I faced emotional discomfort, rewiring fearful beliefs, and more.

🙅🏻‍♀️When I was suffocating from people pleasing in my relationships, I fantasized that if I could *just* stop manipulating in this way, all my problems would go away.

✨The reality is that I had to learn to sit with the discomfort of people being unhappy sometimes. I had to endure shifts in relationship dynamics that could be really triggering. I had to get in touch with my own needs, voice, and desires and practice expressing them honestly.

With growth, I was no longer suffocating from people pleasing. But, there were new challenges: sometimes people were disappointed, some relationships changed, and I had to learn to believe in myself regardless of external validation.

🙅🏻‍♀️When I was in a career that wasn’t right for me, I fantasized that if I could *just* become a coach and start my own business, all my problems would go away.

✨The reality is that I had to face new financial instability and examine my relationship with money. I had to gain skills, like writing copy and learning marketing strategy and using new technologies. I had to decide what kind of leader I wanted to be and start learning how to be her.

Can you relate to any of these fantasies? Or perhaps, they bring to mind a unique one for you?

These are truly just a few that come easily to mind! If we had all day to sit and chat, I could fill every single minute with examples like this… from professional experiences to parenting to exercise, food, body image, marriage, perfectionism, and more.

Why do I have so many examples? Because this is the truth and essence of healing, growth, and change as humans. This is part of our humanity!

In each of these examples, I had to become the version of myself who could handle the new challenges that came along with the dream/desire. I am forever grateful for the guides, coaches, & mentors who helped me along the way (and to those who continue to, too).

I often hear the words of one of my amazing mentors, Naomi Powell: “You have to expand to have the capacity to hold the next level.”

Living with more peace? It has challenges.

Living with more pleasure? It has challenges.

Living with more presence? It has challenges.

Living with more purpose? It has challenges.

I know that nobody wants to hear this, because living in the fantasy is easier. But, I believe in us to rise to these challenges!! We NEED to hear it because our future awaits.

Every new chapter has new challenges and we have the opportunity to expand to hold those. With support and practice, we will find ourselves holding them with more ease.

I’m here to support you to do that. We will walk step by step toward what you desire — gaining the skills, resilience, mindset shifts, perspectives, tools, wisdom, and more along the way so you can hold it all when you experience it.

It’s not always easy, but I am here to help you find your ease.

To learn more, read client stories, and request a consult for my 6-Month Coaching & Mentorship Programclick here!

Or, feel free to hit reply and let me know if you want to connect.

I believe in you! We can do this.

xo, Sim

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