Whatever it is that you’re going through, the person who you’re becoming, the growth that you’re experiencing, the healing that’s happening right now… I know there will be moments that feel hard, tricky, scary, or uncomfortable.

How do I know?

Because you’re a human and that’s all a natural part of the human experience.

We all feel those hard, tricky, scary, and uncomfortable moments.

You’re not alone!

When it comes to intuitive eating, body image work, intuitive movement, and releasing perfection, those moments are a guaranteed part of the process.

And in those moments, it can be easy to catastrophize what feels hard, tricky, scary, or uncomfortable.

Which is why a simple word can change your life: “And.”

Having a tough body image day?

Acknowledge how you’re feeling, what’s making it tough. And, don’t stop there:

“I’m having a really tough body image day, which makes me want to restrict my food AND I’m committed to eating regularly because I know my body needs nourishment. It’s both and.”

Stressed about sleeping in rather than doing your typical early morning workout? Acknowledge how you’re feeling, what’s making it tough.

And, don’t stop there:

“It feels so scary to change my workout plans AND I know my body is asking for rest so that’s what I’m going to practice today. It’s both and.”

Having some critical self talk after eating ice cream with your friends? Acknowledge how you’re feeling, what’s making it tough.

And, don’t stop there:

“I feel panicked after eating a food that I’ve had rules around for so long AND I went outside of my comfort zone to eat what I was craving because healing my relationship with food is something I truly desire.”

It’s not either the discomfort or the growth.

It’s both and.

In coaching, I talk with clients a lot about how our thoughts create > our feelings and our feelings > impact our actions.

That means that when I’m teaching an UNMEASURED barre class, my thoughts about bodies > impact how I feel about bodies (mine, yours, all of ours) which > informs how I act while teaching a class.

In my lifetime, I’ve taken many workout classes where the instructor barked at me to work harder, go faster, push farther in order to change my body. Clearly, their thoughts about what was an “ideal” body impacted how they felt, which dictated how they spoke to me in those classes. The cycle is always there!

Those cues about burning off my brunch or earning a holiday meal? Well, those comments were stemming from diet culture beliefs.

And, because exercise is so heavily influenced by diet culture, I think we almost expect to go into a workout class only to have to dodge those comments, try to tune out the shame, and attempt to let the body-judgment roll off our backs.

It doesn’t have to be this way.

​When you take barre class with me in UNMEASURED, you should know that this is what I’m thinking about your body…

Your body is SO WISE.

Your body is not a problem to be fixed.

Your body is worth listening to.

Your body deserves to take up space.

Your body is worthy of love, care, and respect.

Your body belongs here.

Your body gets to feel safe and supported.

Your body is on purpose.

Your body is magic in motion.

I’m so grateful your body is here.

All of that is what I’m thinking about your body when you take my barre class.

And, it means the world when members let me know that the intention behind each class is truly felt:“I recently (and reluctantly) signed up for unmeasured. I say reluctantly as I have never had a positive relationship with barre. I am a former dancer, and while I gravitated to the movement when it first gained a following years ago, I always felt this pull to manipulate my body due to the focus on “the shakes” and “long lean muscles”. I would then feel like something bad was going to happen if I didn’t do it all the time. I am in recovery from an eating disorder, so this was not a healthy mentality for me.
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I LOVE movement and find “dance” type movement really joyful. I have been looking to add something else to my “menu”, and decided to sign up for unmeasured more because I adore you and the work you are doing in this world than a desire to do barre. I also believe in voting with my dollar. I tried my first class yesterday and OMG I freaking LOVED it. I was honestly not expecting to really like it.
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I felt SO tuned into my body while practicing and so strong when I was finished. Additionally, I actually found myself taking intuitive breaks (which is a challenge for me) as you modeled these breaks yourself throughout class. I am super excited to do another class.
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Thank you from the bottom of my heart for the gifts that you have given me and so many other women through the incredible and authentic work you are doing in the world.”

Whether you move with me in UNMEASURED or your intuitive relationship with movement calls you somewhere else, remember these truths:

Your body is SO WISE.

Your body is not a problem to be fixed.

Your body is worth listening to.

Your body deserves to take up space.

Your body is worthy of love, care, and respect.

Your body belongs here.

Your body gets to feel safe and supported.

Your body is on purpose.

Your body is magic in motion.

This past weekend, I got a DM from someone who was curious with how drinking alcohol fits in with this whole intuitive eating journey.

We’ve talked about this in HELD (my coaching community) this summer and I think it’s an important part of the intuitive eating conversation! With everything I encourage you to do, I hope you’ll lead with curiosity (and today’s email will help you do just that).

But before I dive in, a few reminders:

It is not only OK but so important to reach out and seek support if you think you may be struggling with alcohol addiction. There is NO shame in struggling and so much freedom in getting qualified support.

Also, if you have chosen to be sober because of past struggles with alcohol, a family history of alcoholism, trauma, religious reasons, or something else, then I hope you’ll continue to honor that choice that is right for YOU!

I’m in no way telling you that you should drink. Please skip today’s email if it feels triggering in anyway.

For those curious about what an intuitive relationship with alcohol can look like, then this email is for you!

If I had to boil ‘intuitive drinking’ down to a single idea, it would be freedom to drink (or not drink) an amount of alcohol that adds fun / pleasure without increasing pain or interfering with you showing up for your life.

Typically, the way we do one thing is the way we do everything.

So, if you have an “all or nothing” relationship with food, you might also feel like you struggle with an “all or nothing” relationship with alcohol (and movement and a lot of other areas of your life).

As you begin to eat more intuitively, other areas of life will start to shift, too. Including alcohol!

Today, I want to share some helpful questions you can ask yourself to help you honor yourself more deeply in your relationship with alcohol.

What would my ideal relationship with alcohol actually look like?

If you didn’t feel social pressure or diet pressure or any other pressure for it to look a certain way, what would you LIKE your relationship with alcohol to look like? Take a minute to think, reflect, and write what comes up for you.

Did I eat enough?

It’s a lot harder to feel well drinking when you’re drinking on an empty stomach. If you’re afraid of the calories in alcohol or the sugar or carbs, then you might find yourself restricting to ‘make up for’ the drink(s).

Plus, alcohol inhibits the hunger hormone, so once you start drinking food may sound less appetizing (which means more alcohol on an even emptier stomach).

Make sure you’re keeping your body fed!

Why am I choosing to drink right now?

Is it to impress someone or to “fit in”? Is it because you’re struggling with feeling awkward in this moment? Or, is it because a drink actually sounds really fun and delicious?

If it’s for someone else or to soothe discomfort, ask yourself what it would be like to make a different choice (i.e. honoring your body even if it’s different than your friends or take a moment to process through your social discomfort and / or feelings).

How will this make me feel in this moment AND tomorrow?

Intuitive eating (including drinking) is about making loving choices for ourselves in the moment — yes. But, it’s also about making loving choices for our future selves.

Will this help me show up more or less fully in my life?

This is one of my favorite questions of all time to ask myself. Here’s a blog post I wrote about it awhile back, too!​

If I’m at a beautiful Italian dinner, a glass of wine might feel lovely to pair with the meal — making it a more satisfying experience (more fully).

If I’m at a party and feeling pressure to take a shot of tequila even though I don’t want one, then taking it would mean being untrue to my own needs (less fully).

Just like with any food, what works for your body and what feels best for you is going to be different in different moments, days, and situations. It will also likely be different from the people around you.

Practice dropping the judgment and getting CURIOUS with yourself instead.

What might it look like to honor yourself as you drink (or don’t)?

Just sit with this question for a moment and notice what is true for you.

Last week while I was speaking to a corporate team about intuitive eating + movement, someone asked:

“What do I do if I’m craving sugar constantly?”

I deeply related to this question because I had it at the start of my intuitive eating journey many years ago. Are you wondering the same thing, too?

If so, this one’s for you.

First, the language you use around food is such an awesome opportunity for curiosity.

What does “constantly” mean to you?

For many people, diet culture “food rules” can turn a personal preference for something sweet into a personal judgment.

Do you really think about sugar 24/7? Or is “constantly” actually code for you enjoying something sweet at meals to feel satisfied?

How would your relationship to the desire for something sweet shift if you gave yourself permission to enjoy what you enjoy?

If you gave yourself permission to feel SATISFIED around food?

A simple shift in mindset + language here can be powerful!

Second, if your answer to the question above is that you are truly thinking about sugar 24/7, then that’s another great opportunity. This time, to meet your body’s needs.

Sugar = carbs = energy.

If your mind is fixated on sugar literally all the time, it’s likely that your body is trying to get the “I NEED ENERGY” message across in response to some form of restriction.

If this is the situation, I encourage you to see if you’re restricting (intentionally or unintentionally).

Are you eating enough food throughout the day? [if not, it makes sense that your body would be asking for more energy!]

Are you eating enough starchy carbohydrates throughout the day? [if not, it makes sense that your body would be asking for that kind of energy!]

Are you physically restricting sugar (i.e. not allowing yourself to eat it)? [if so, it makes sense that your body would be realllllly wanting that!]

Are you mentally restricting sugar (i.e. eating it but thinking how “bad” it is the whole time and how you “shouldn’t” eat it anymore)? [if so, it makes sense that you’d be craving it since it feels off limits]

If any of the above questions show you that there is some restriction (physical or mental) happening, then releasing the rules and restriction will be a great next step.

Lastly, are your human needs — beyond the physical — being met?

If you check in and all your physical needs are being met + you’re not restricting food in any way… yet you still find yourself thinking about sugar 24/7… it might be “emotional restriction.”

As humans, we all desire what I call “The Craving Trifecta”…

REST

PLEASURE

CONNECTION

Check in with yours:

Are you resting when you need to rest?

Are you experiencing pleasure in your life?

Are you cultivating connection with others and yourself?

When you are physically nourished and satisfied but the sugar cravings are constant, ask yourself:

If this wasn’t about food what would this be about?

Sometimes the places we need nourishment + satisfaction are on our plates and sometimes they are off!

On every journey of healing there is a moment when the intention of the journey shifts.

At the start of most healing, there is a pain or discomfort you’re seeking to ease.

Somewhere along the way, there is a shift that happens.

A shift from pain to pleasure.

There will be a moment when your intention will shift from decreasing the original discomfort to increasing future pleasure.

This can go almost undetected yet it’s a huge moment in the healing journey.

Look for it, notice it, celebrate it!

We made a quick getaway to Austin TX last weekend and I fell in love with the city!

Now, you should know that I am a bit of a nervous flier (ok a verrrrry nervous flier).

Anytime there is turbulence, fear rushes over me, my hands start sweating, and tears begin bubbling up in my eyes. I’ve tried all the mantras and breathing techniques but nothing has made this panic disappear.

Until our flight home from TX.

As we were cruising smoothly through the sky, our pilot came on the loud speakers and said,

“Hey there! We are flying into a big cloud ahead and we are expecting some turbulence. It will be bumpy while we fly through. Nothing out of the ordinary for a flight through the sky! I’ll have you home safely at our scheduled arrival time.”

Sure enough: we hit those bumps.

But something wild happened: I was not shaking, sweating, and crying. I was totally ok.

Something about the pilot sharing proactively made the discomfort feel ok.

I started thinking about how we need more of these overhead announcements with intuitive eating.

What if when you boarded this “intuitive eating” flight with destination food freedom, your pilot shared:

“Hey there! As expected, we are going to encounter some turbulence ahead.

There will be fears you’ll have to work through. The diet culture and fatphobia conditioning can be challenging to unlearn!

There will be mindset shifts you’ll have to make. A paradigm shift takes time to experience!

There will be challenging moments of relearning your body’s signals. Plus, learning to trust those cues can be tricky, too.

There will be times when that person you’re following on IG talks about her diet and you wonder, ‘should I do that, too?’ These moments of questioning are natural.

Yes, there will turbulence. Every single person on this flight will experience some bumps! It’s a normal part of flying these skies.

We will fly through it before a safe landing at your final destination.”

Because sometimes when this intuitive eating turbulence hits, our fear can tell us that the bumps means that something is wrong.

For all of us, the turbulence is part of the journey. Turbulence is to be expected and it doesn’t mean anything is wrong or bad. We are going to get there safely!

You’re so worth it and your future self will be thanking you every single day.

You are going to get there safely.

Over a decade ago, I was secretly struggling with binge eating.

I’d spend all day long doing everything “right.” Everything the health magazines told me to do. Everything the books recommended. Everything celebrities claimed worked wonders for them. Everything my nutritionist instructed me to do.

I measured my food, counted my calories, ate only things on the “abundant health” list. I pounded the pavement every morning and made it to hot yoga as many evenings as I possibly could. I hydrated hydrated hydrated.

I followed the rules.

I did everything “right.”

Doing everything “right” according to diet culture? Well, this triggered a binge.

Day after day, week after week. I’d find myself standing in front of the open fridge door, rummaging through the cabinets, shoveling as much food into my mouth as I possibly could.

It would start with “just one” spoon of peanut butter. “Just one” graham cracker. “Just one” of whatever I was eating that was “wrong” and before I knew it, it was like I had disconnected from my body. I was in a trance. I was hovering above myself, looking down as I methodically ate and ate and ate.

Here’s the thing: I’ve worked with a lot of women who come to me with the same story that I had. The story of doing everything “right.”

But what is “right” by diet culture’s standards? Is not right for you.

Restriction and food rules (encouraged by diet culture) trigger binges.

The answer to healing binges is not doing more of what diet culture tells you is “right.”

The answering is in releasing the idea that one way of eating is “right” or “better” or “good” and, instead, learning how to tune in to your body, nourish yourself consistently, and find freedom from the diet culture lies.

If you’re ending your day and just had a binge (a common time for binges to occur after a day of restriction) and you’re beating yourself up because you’re doing everything “right” except the binges keep coming…

I hope this will be a moment of truth for you.

Your binges are your body’s way of trying to protect you from the restriction that diet culture tells us is “right.”

Healing is not on the other side of MORE rules. It’s on the other side of freedom from them!

If you’re struggling with binges, I share a supportive practice here in this post.

Struggling with binges? Today, I’d love to share a powerful practice that can help.

Binges can make you feel SO isolated. But I want you to know, you’re not alone.

I know from personal experience and working with hundreds of other women who have struggled with binge eating that there can be so much shame and secrecy around binges. Eating less is so glorified and celebrated by diet culture, making the moments where you feel like you “eat too much” feel extra tough.

I openly share about my past struggles with binge eating (like here in Letting Go of Leo) because I want you to know that you’re NOT alone and you don’t have to feel ashamed. In fact, binges are one way your body is trying to keep you safe.

Yes, it’s true! Binges are self protective in nature.

Binges are most often a response / reaction to some kind of restriction. That means that healing binge eating isn’t necessarily about the binges themselves, but about shifting from a cycle of restriction into a practice of deep self nourishment.

The most common forms of restriction that can cause binges are…

Physical restriction:

Not eating enough food overall or not eating enough of certain foods (i.e. an overall energy deficit or a deficit of something like carbs or fat).

Research shows us that the calorie recommendation for most diets is “comparable to that of the most undernourished global regions, where severe hunger interferes with individuals’ ability to thrive.” In addition to that, more than half of adults have dieted in the last year and 75% of ALL women in the US (across all racial, ethnic, and age groups) reported disordered eating behavior.

As you can imagine, physical restriction is increasingly common in a society obsessed with diets (or “lifestyles” as they are often called).

Mental restriction:

The rules or judgments you carry in your mind, often picked up from diet culture, about food. This typically sounds like “good” or “bad” foods, what / when / how you “should” or “shouldn’t” eat, and any feelings of morality that you have tied to certain foods (i.e. eating a certain way would make you a better or more worthy person). I’ve often had clients tell me they don’t restrict, only to discover a mind full of food rules that they don’t even realize they are carrying around. Just because you’re not physically restricting what you eat doesn’t mean you’re not experiencing the impact caused by food rules / judgments.

Emotional restriction:

This can show up as numbing out of or attempting to distract from emotions, ignored emotional needs, and / or unmet or unexpressed cravings or desires in your life. This can be in your relationship with food but it can also be in any area of your life.

After seeing so much emotional restriction in my clients over the years, I created the idea of the “Craving Trifecta” which is: rest, connection, and pleasure. You can use the Craving Trifecta as a tool to check in with yourself in any area of your life to bring awareness to what you’re craving.

Shifting from a cycle of restriction into a practice of self nourishment takes AWARENESS. Here’s a practice to care for yourself post-binge that can help:

First, wait until you feel emotionally ready to do this. It’s ok if you’re not ready the moment directly following the binge. You can wait a few hours or even a day or two.

Second, once ready, reflect on the 24-48 hours leading up to + including the binge. Write the facts of what happened, what you experienced, any thoughts or feelings you can identify, etc.

Third, go back slowly over those 24-48 hours and write a second narrative about what you needed, desired, or craved in each moment.

This powerful practice gently invites deep awareness of self and freedom from judgment (which often arises in the guilt, shame, and secrecy of a binge) through curiosity:

What did I need?

What was I craving?

What did I desire in that moment?

Through this awareness, you can take small steps to begin to meet those needs + honor those cravings and desires: creating a practice of deep nourishment (physical, mental, emotional).

Try this practice out and see what you discover.

With summer just around the corner (although, here in Columbus Ohio, it already feels like it’s arrived), it’s a great time to check in with yourself…

How do you want to feel this summer?

Don’t rush past this question: take a moment to really feel into it.

After a year and a half of a global pandemic, I know I’m feeling deeply grateful for a season that begs us to come outside and play in the sunshine. I’m ready for silly, sunny, sweaty days.

And, I also know that playing in the sunshine is not what everyone thinks about when they hear the word “summer.”

What comes to mind for you when you think about this summer?

For most of my life, I HATED (all caps necessary to properly communicate the disdain) summer.

The swimsuits and shorts made me feel like my body was on display. I assumed everyone else was picking me apart in all the ways I picked myself apart every single day.

Summer, for me, was a time when the intense year round pressure to “fix” my body got even more intense. I was constantly counting down how many days I had until my next social event and negotiating what food and exercise rules I needed to be following until then.

The increase in social plans sent me into a spiral. Constantly worrying about what I would eat, if I’d be able to follow those aforementioned food and exercise rules, and what would happen if I couldn’t.

I was so focused on trying to control myself that I was distracted all summer long. Who could enjoy a BBQ or dip in the pool while at war with herself inside?

Not me that’s for frickin’ sure.

When the sun came out and the clothes got smaller, I felt so SEEN. And, I did NOT like that.

Because I wasn’t able to truly see, love, or accept myself at that time, I was so deeply uncomfortable with others seeing me. It was incredibly challenging on so many levels.

Can you relate?

But those many painful summers I spent hating myself and counting down until I could hide under a cozy  blanket come fall?

Well, they led me here… to this very moment… writing this very email to you.

They were the catalyst to my own healing journey – a journey that I wouldn’t trade for anything in this world.

They are a part of why I’m so passionate about helping women to release perfection, heal their relationships with food + movement + their bodies, and cultivate deeper self-trust, self-compassion, and self-connection.

They are part of why I created my signature summer program Well & BEING years ago and my coaching community HELD this year.

If you’re struggling with the upcoming change in season, I feel so deeply for you. I promise you that it doesn’t always have to be this way.

As if a global pandemic isn’t hard enough, diet culture found a way to use COVID as fuel for its fire. The pressure + messages about controlling and “fixing” our bodies with food, exercise, and willpower have only gotten louder, more manipulative, and more intense.

I know for so many, the feelings and fears coming up around this summer are reflective of that.

You may be navigating body changes, trying on clothes that no longer fit, preparing to see people who you haven’t seen since pre-COVID, anticipating conversations centered around diets + weight loss, or navigating all the mixed emotions emerging as things begin opening up again.

You’ve been through a lot. This is all a lot. You are not alone.

Today, I want to offer you some opportunities to connect with yourself, reflect on what you’re experiencing, and get clarity on where you’d like to go:

• What messages did you hear about food, movement, body etc during the pandemic?
• In recent years, how have you felt about summer?
• How is this year similar or different?
• What fears or worries are coming up for you as summer approaches?
• How do those impact your inner dialogue, the way you feel about yourself, how you show up in your life, and / or how you treat yourself?
• What are you looking forward to this summer?
• If you felt at home in your body this summer, what would you say “YES” to?
• And, what would you say “NO” to?
• How do you want to FEEL this summer?
• What would you need to let go of or release in order to experience that?
• What would you need to accept, believe, or embrace to experience that?

Take a minute to let all of this wisdom that just came through really soak in. And, when you’re ready, I’d love you to ask yourself about what you NEED:

• Would more self-trust, self-compassion, and self-connection feel helpful?
• Would support to feel more grounded in + at home in your body (through intuitive eating, intuitive movement, body image support, and emotional wellbeing) feel helpful?
• Would working to create & communicate loving boundaries this summer feel helpful?
• What about cultivating a deep inner sense of confidence?
• What about finding ease and freedom in your relationship with food?

If any of the above would feel supportive, I’m here for you.

And if the thought of being surrounded by a community of warm, loving, welcoming women who GET IT with me as your coach would feel helpful, I’ve got an invitation for you:

​Grab your spot on the waitlist for HELD x Well & BEING summer support here.

Tomorrow, the doors to HELD (my coaching community) will be opening for 1 week. This is the only time the doors will be opening this summer and it’s the last time to join for $50 / month.

As a special bonus for my coaching community, I’m sharing Well & BEING (my signature summer program that’s all about getting grounded and feeling at home in your body through intuitive eating, intuitive movement, body image, and emotional wellbeing) EXCLUSIVELY within my HELD community this summer.

The only “catch”? You have to be on the HELD waitlist if you want to receive emails letting you know when doors open + sharing all the amazing details, answers to your Qs, member testimonials, and more.

Want to learn more? Join the waitlist for HELD x Well & BEING summer support here.​

If you do, I’ll be in your inbox tomorrow with an invitation for a summer full of beautiful support, encouragement, community, and coaching.

What if you didn’t have to spend all summer hating your body? Just imagine it.

There is magic in mothering yourself.
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I know Mother’s Day is often about our relationships with others. And, I know that for each of us, this day may bring up many different emotions, reactions, memories.
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This month in HELD we’ve been diving into the theme of inner critic.

Much of what we’ve talked about so far is how the inner critic — that inner voice that often meets you with judgment — first develops with the positive intention of self protection. When your inner child feels afraid, not enough, too much, rejected, or wounded, the inner critic can develop as a way to protect that part of yourself. The intent of self protection can be positive even if experiencing the inner critic is anything but.

All month long in HELD we’re practicing really being with ALL parts of ourselves. The hopes, dreams, fears, feelings.
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What do your inner child & inner critic (or whatever you prefer to call these parts of yourself) truly need?

To feel seen, heard, unconditionally loved. To be held.
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Your inner mother wants to offer you all of these. To say to you, “wow that must have been so hard. I can see you’re hurting. I’m here with you. I love you. I’ll stay with you, hold you, and care for you through this.”

This Mother’s Day, whatever this holiday brings up for you, your inner mother can meet you in the hopes, dreams, fears, feelings. To see and hear you. To offer you unconditional love. To hold you.
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There is magic in mothering yourself.