Anyone else feel like this past year cracked you open in such big, deep ways?
Here you are, looking at all the pieces broken apart…
Not entirely clear yet on how you want to put them back together…
Very clear that you don’t want to put them back exactly where they were before?
If so, I’m here with you.
I’m giving myself permission to pause when I’m not sure where the next piece goes. To let there be space. Openness.
To slowly put pieces together in new ways. I’m giving myself permission to take my time. To let it be a lifelong work of art if that’s how long it takes.
For me, this is a season of little dreams. Maybe the start of a life of them?
About a year ago I began to feel myself having a recurring vision.
It came during the day and it came in the middle of the night.
I was in a house with a lot of windows. I didn’t know “where” I was but I knew it was home.
In the dream, my kids were a little older. Always morning time, we were surrounded by nature and light was pouring through the trees into the windows.
I could hear the kids quietly getting ready for the day. While they moved about, I went outside and picked greens from the garden for breakfast. I’d throw in the greens and berries and lemon, watching it swirl around. The sound of the blender called the kids to the kitchen. They pulled up to the counter, bed head, sleepy eyes. Tim strolled up with his coffee in hand.
We sipped and chatted together. Everyone relaxed. Sunlight reflecting off their wispy hair. At ease.
This was the whole dream.
It just kept coming back to me over and over again. At times, it was hard to even picture anything else. I bet I’ve dreamed it a thousand times.
I kept sharing it with Tim. Drawing him pictures of the space I saw in my mind. Talking about the greens in the garden for the smoothies.
I have no idea if this dream is an vision of a future place we will call home or if it was simply a reminder of what is calling me home right now: simple moments, presence, connection.
All my dreams right now are little.
I’m pretty sure Tim got tired of me recapping the same story, so he built a garden. We filled it with life.
Each day, we’ve been collecting veggies for dinner and gathering leafy greens for morning smoothies. We say “hi” to the garden each morning. I feel a sense of gratitude each time we eat what grew in our back yard.
Every “big” dream I’ve had in my life that I’ve been able to realize has led me back to the little dreams.
Do you feel that, too?
Dancing to a song that makes you feel alive. Listening to birds chirp. Feeling sun on your face. Smelling the skin of someone you love. Walking barefoot in the grass.
I can feel it reflecting back to me in my life. Really wanting to listen. A few deep friendships. Reading bedtime stories. Seeing the magic in all the small moments.
I can feel it reflecting back to me in my work. Spending an entire month on a meaningful theme (like we do in HELD) rather than rushing through + onto the next. Spending less time on social media so I can go deeper with my community. Finding real joy + excitement to share each new barre class with UNMEASURED.
Letting go and allowing space. Openness.
I can feel it deep inside.
A season of little dreams coming true.
Are you in a season of little dreams, too?